In 2022, my kid and I each wrote a haiku almost every day. Along the way, we found it difficult to compose and share all these poems, so we also started making an app to help us write together. We’ll release the app later this year.

Throughout the process we gained a new appreciation for poetry. I came to love the artifical contraints and forced economy of meaning within three lines of text. Words became more like a sculptural material, and we often tried to contort them to make unexpected combinations.

The list below contains every haiku I wrote. When you write one every day, most of them are terrible! But there are a few gems scattered throughout, and we improved a lot over the course of the year. A handful of my favorites are marked with an extra highlight.

If you like any of them, or if you’re curious about our process, send me a toot or email.


January

the very first time
there is a long road ahead
and that is the joy
existentially
i have some questions
but no time to ask
the clock is ticking
we hear it in the present
which is now the past
the curious things
we haven’t imagined yet
could become real
who absconded the
pop-tart that had been toasted
breakfast was ghosted
there were retractions
of the redactions hiding
legal infractions
sorry we could not
pay attention. our accounts
have been overdrawn
representatives
are standing by, please press one
until they sit down
a light extinguished
abruptly stopped, left no trace
but we remember
this hullaballoo
cacophanous balderdash
all mumbo jumbo
icy epitaph
of previous days frozen
a graceful stasis
please dear never mind
the right words i could not find
dropped out of my mind
empty shelves out of
stock markets breaking all time
record low morale
all the commuters,
computers, distributors
remotely working
these unusual
times have become usual
to abuse you all
sadly risible
a problem divisible
and invisible
we did not care for
your thoughts but you still put them
on this damn web site
phone rang three more times
unknown caller voicemail
pyramid scheme grift
our company is
like a family except
we will control you
a saturday night
fever dream imagining
alternate futures
if somewhere there is
another plane of spirits
i hope i see you
i want to go home
but this place is no longer
the same as it was
cracks in the plaster
looking up at the ceiling
is that a new one
hey i just met you
and this is crazy so here’s
a retraining order
hallucination,
imagination, or in
a simulation?
the robots have tracked
you and tried to distract you
it worked they hacked you
ambiguity
in all the words that you said
left me feeling cold
reflective sunrise
blasting through the cracks in the
curtains awakened
peering into a
dewdrop mirror image of
infinite spaces
off in the distance
past all the trees, did you see?
capitalists
feeling uneasy
burnt coffee tv static
water left running

February

all these sycophants
devotees and followers
attention hungry
hyperbolic noise
undulating through brainwaves
like stinging nettles
loading loading please
wait loading loading please wait
loading loading please
rainbows and meltdowns
unicorns and malady
glittery sadness
timely just in time
time out losing track of time
timeless out of time
eyeballs and hive minds
wasted on cheap bravado
polemic bombast
ringing in the years
wringing hands in latent fears
ringing in your ears
these unexpected
surprises snuck up like thieves
of our intentions
transmissions and codes
linking distant souls like a
ouija board seance
lost my mind somewhere
in aisle nine next to the
pickles and regret
chasing success and
grinding vanity hustle
bloodshot consequence
current resident
you have been selected to
throw away junk mail
confederate flag
urban assault vehicle
parked at chick-fil-a
image degraded
specific memories now
unfathomable
you irascible
scallywag with your crackpot
theories and grousing
staring into the
middle distance you left me
these obfuscations
running uphill you
appeared like magic and we
both ran together
what things did you see
before all this existed
when you were brand new
sacrosanct rules
built on indefensible
careless positions
psychedelic hues
maximum velocity
eyes closed spinning dark
self esteem self care
self conscious self aware self
loathing self despair
tiny little man
desperately trying to be
a really big deal
way in the future
wave from your flying car and
remember these days
grasping at straws or
gasping for air, parked out on
this bridge to nowhere
feeling sheepish
we did not anticipate
your savage actions
mountains sliced in half
streets carving up the river
vehicle worship
imperceptibly
subtle changes happening
slowly but quickly

March

stumbling backwards
repeating history for
deluded glory
the frenetic flap
of a hummingbird’s wing
to achieve stillness
what luck and fortune
to have a charmed life was it
karma or privilege
blast radius shock
waves crashing in from the sea
shell artillery
incredulity
institutionalizing
animosity
we taught the machine
to teach itself so it could
manipulate us
words words words words words
inundation of way too
much information
is this really a
worthwhile use of your time
shouting on facebook
the living dead heads
of state of mind your business
acumen at work
password secret key
finger print face ID i
am not a robot
all hopped up on corn
syrup and jingoism
crowds chant USA
star dust assembled
spontaneously grateful
you are here with me
hung out to dry with
your laissez-faire attitude
and banal ennui
quarterly metrics
targets and strategic goals
while burning the earth
walking a tightrope
dodging lacerations from
this porcupine mood
swig another drink
in a blustering brain fog
going through motions
moonlight obstructed
radiating light shadows
hazy silhouette
making excuses
petty justifications
soothe fragile egos
hark! forsooth! crikey!
dagnabbit! bollocks! blimey!
gadzooks! tarnation!
i don’t recognize
the aged visage looking in
the rear view mirror
pea pods paw pads see
saws crawdads meemaws doodads
scrimshaws TV ads
business man on a
corporate retreat slinging
pie charts and cocaine
magic god truth or
lies 5G conspiracy
what do you believe
between consciousness
i left all my best ideas
inaccessible
a slight objection
to your deflection which was
gaslight projection
dropping connection
weak signal breaking up
we lost each other
i’m trying to get
this over with but i still
can’t get over it
claustrophobic fog
of unreasonable pressure
you put on yourself
stop speaking in codes
nonsense jargon and lingo
two plus two is five

April

restoration or
intrusion, chemtrails or clouds
nature or human
dull stinging heartburn
residual from caring
more than we should have
drugstore fluorescent
sterile bottle painkillers
$21
clouds part sun ray bolts
squint eyes look down touch soft ground
pulse race head throbs crash
hollow claims punching
down ginning up outrage with
alternative facts
the rattling air ducts
a pencil stroke on paper
distant road noise hums
emotions hung up
like pressed shirts in the closet
languishing unused
electric lamp beams
disrespectful light into
the sacred dark night
system entropy
chaotic armageddeon
let’s go to the mall
confrontations and
escalations drumming up
these palpitations
fading sun light on
the horizon remember
all those times we had
spinning lately in
circumspect spirals lacking
confidence or spunk
jumping the tracks and
leaving pennies to get smashed
thrill of breaking rules
unacknowledged
despair left silent, buried
is eating at me
constant wavering
assertive indecisions
permanent changes
biding time until
the collapse or renaissance
villain or hero
spotted a UFO
watched a sea creature rise up
no one believed me
smoky orange scent
acidic metal taste of
adrenaline fear
freefalling into
unexpected dimensions
the ripcord has failed
casting lines off the
roof of the parking garage
late summer sundays
trying to silence
the noise within and look calm
so no one can tell
buzzing frequency
vibrating off of your head
nagging subconscious
stop invading my
headspace like a stray dog who
jumped over the fence
press this series of
buttons and you will control
all of the puppets
hey let’s make a deal
door number one two or three
sorry they’re all traps
worn creases on your
denim jacket, lines on your
forehead, past present
accept all cookies
terms of service I agree
skip ad like subscribe
take a break in half
just keep your head down the drain
carry on fire
your circuitous
twisted logic lighting gas
and blowing whistles
hot steam rising off
the pavement billowing haze
wilted humid minds

May

16 hours grinding
left catatonic and numb
8 hours silent
alarms and sirens
honking horns and blinking lights
but nothing changes
lavender hand soap
cotton candy sedative
kiwi root canal
i’m keeping busy
appearances of progress
calendars booked up
coffee left on a
little too long but drinking
the burn anyway
the gilded age of
anxiety influencers
desperate hustling
exit door blast off
hurtling through great heights until
concrete reunions
the sweet relief of
hot sun pouring through a cracked
sullen hazy gray
memories faded
in blurry outlines of past
love and adventures
we did not bother
to follow the rules due to
distrust and boredom
the temporary
silence projects visions of
future loneliness
oh hello we have
some news for you. everything
is pure chaos. haha
ring ring ring ring ring
ring ring ring ring ring ring ring
smash the snooze button
i will not abide
this divide over which you
preside amplified
gumdrop rainbow bright
tie dye circumstance skate shop
lilac escapade
there is a lot of
hot air blowing out your mouth
are you a balloon
chipped away at all
the energy we once had
now a burned out husk
hot cinnamon bun
sugarcoated dragonfly
afternoon mai tai
forgot why I wound
this string around my finger
so not to forget
phone rings computer
dings oven sings dryer bings
always nagged by things
carbonated air
conditioned pressure treated
shrink wrapped bleached and starched
all aboard this ship
never mind those loud sirens
please ignore the leaks
trading hours spent
at this glowing rectangle
to pay for free time
edits of updates
of revisions of changes
to all the edits
setting reminders
to schedule future events
to feel productive
please pass the mustard
this stale hot dog tastes like
diesel gas and wax
fog fog fog fog fog
lacking energy to think
or think of thinking
tunneling to the
other side of the world
to escape despair
interrupting worms
digging into habitats
for vegetables
blistering rays of
moonlight dancing on the roof
of your toyota
stop asking questions
about this self anointed
empire in ruins

June

brushing the dirt off
the sprouting of a seedling
hello bright white sky
breaking news reports
the same horrible thing that
just keeps happening
thou shalt not break thy
rules or thou shalt regret thy
deserved comeuppance
serenade infused
melodious energy
into my brainwaves
melted hot concrete
fried eggs and exhaust fumes
sun imposition
leftover sandwich
used to taste better but now
a soggy remorse
how are you doing
how was your weekend how are
your intrusive thoughts
dear sir or madam
we regret to inform you
nonstop for profit
bionic tonic
supersonic mnemonic
stereophonic
effervescent fizz
refreshing when you cracked the
bottle on my head
pouring chemicals
for grass that shouldn’t be there
killing weeds that should
bonded magnetic
effect surprisingly still
unbroken through years
crossed lines frequencies
ricochet word salad mush
across the wires
acquisitions and
contracts very cool very
legal very cursed
corporate julie
from downstate stuck alone in
fluorescent spreadsheets
purchased butts estates
a lovely gentrified place
full of total butts
little bird perched on
a blue plastic tube waiting
for the end of this
the applicants and
supplicants beseeching the
grants and sycophants
honest bulletin
announcing the lies framed as
truths by the liars
we won’t tolerate
that which offends our strong
righteous tolerance
AFAIK
IOU ASAP
JK IDC
trading cash for memes
fake coins and frauds made up to
make money and run
disclaimer fine print
everything we said was false
hope you were convinced
why did you eat that
gastrointestinal rage
stop belly aching
why this unforeseen
lethargy taking over
is it apathy
chartreuse turquoise smile
charcuterie tortoise smell
charcoal target small
horizontal line
stillness without inertia
pain interrupted
choke down these six pills
for the next five days so that
you will keep breathing

July

broken fever dream
collapsed in a frozen pool
unable to swim
rendering any
original thought will take
too much energy
wheeze and sleep this day
away while contemplating
mortality thoughts
what price will you pay
for the indefensible
freedom you worship
oh hello this is
another report from here
it’s all just the same
lingering inside
these four walls I can access
the world but not you
negative nay no
zip zero zilch nothing none
nada nary nope
this sunlight above
feels radiant and warm like
old friends forgotten
substitute candy
a valiant attempt but tastes
like disappointment
misconduct and greed
in twisted sordid scenes like
hieronymus bosch
intractable fool
obstinate ignoramus
indelible dolt
eternal robot
reincarnated again
as a new robot
what is this strange noise
emanating from this phone
why are you calling
rubber neck steel toe
glass house wood chuck gold star stone
wall chain mail string cheese
what random access
memory retrieved this lost
old note from beyond
the last sliver of
daylight disappears behind
the horizon, blue
hey siri hey google
alexa! can you hear me
please stop listening
the smell of burnt toast
lingering in this kitchen
butter sitting out
your neutrality
is maddening please decide
you’re not switzerland
this machine is not
accepting cash deposits
unclear what paused it
that bulwark stalwart
walmart pop tart matriarch
porch plastered hallmark
circling in place
passing by points visited
pretending they’re new
monsters hiding in
your mind’s attic waiting for
rude interruptions
synthetic parties
and prosthetic emotions
posted to insta
heart accelerant
fast forwarding rapidly
hanging on for life
shopping mall yoga
vitamins and supplements
schemes to get rich quick
poltergeist haunting
the sock drawer inconvenient
horror laundromat

August

trading your life’s time
for numbers in a spreadsheet
amid restless nights
32 winters
since the old river ran dry
this desert wasteland
checking your schedule
looking for blocks of free time
you’re not free at all
cantankerous joe
rides a miniature bike
on the submarine
why is the tv
advertising volume cranked
up to eleven
hi hello good day
a new opportunity
to stay in this rut
smooth saxophone jazz
wafting from the loudspeaker
while the bombs rain down
deadlines killing me
need a lifeline to keep from
lyin dead on the floor
dramatic mambo
dancing aliens from space
popping by for cake
some dull engine roar
off in the distance bleating
toxic atmosphere
the fear of regret
left a bitter aftertaste
resentment stasis
all the vibes are off
nothing works when you need it
works fine when you don’t
impenetrable
fortress government building
intimidation
microscopic drops
of pop atop mop top cops
coke crimes chop shop flops
skipping stones off the
pier watching waves roll in from
speedboats far away
popcorn popping on
raindrops dropping on (the roof)
bops bop bopping on
holding on for me
nothing left to give to you
selfish introspect
backache radiate
dull twinge of electric shock
in nervous networks
this indecision
calling attention to your
lack of bravery
waves in lockstep with
the orbiting moon sending
sultry vibrations
pachinko machine
chirping sweet persuasions and
taking your money
unexpected frog
appearance showing up by
surprise in this room
texting five feet from
each other separated
by air and drywall

September

hi mister cool guy
ray ban sunglasses sun tan
linen pants yacht rock
conspiracy schemes
posted on 4chan riled up
the nerds and memes
glued to devices
forgot how to think clearly
can’t pull to refresh
melancholy breeze
passes by summer’s last gasp
portending the end
legal proceedings
shouting negotiations
peanut gallery
seismic pressure broke
cracks in the pavement patched by
dinosaur petrol
wrong left turn left me
alone left out to dry left
behind in left field
conflicted worries
mixed into confusion soup
noodles of panic
torrential waves pour
over coffee subconscious
background mind freakout
wicked bingo game
disclaimer five in a row
summons the spirits
administrative
bureaucratic cubicle
autocratic rule
wearing a mask to
hide the truth or protect the
others from knowing
that nonconformist
t-shirt you like is half off at
urban outfitters
4am jolted
awake by uncertainty
spinning in the dark
permanent mellow
unending apathetic
consistently meh
revelatory
optimism of what has
yet to be explored
never mind the brain
sending rational commands
working against you
busy bulls buzzing
big bad business bureaucrats
belching beta bets

October

we changed when our
trust fell apart and couldn’t
be reassembled
we have considered
all the facts and concluded
you are an asshole
please insert card now
do not remove card do not
REMOVE CARD RIGHT NOW
hyperbolic hell
hysterical heightening
hyperventilating
we had objections
your dishonest deflections
feigned disconnections
is escapism
healthy self preservation
or just negligence
felled a redwood tree
to craft the furniture that
went right out of style
lemon rose spirits
sprinkled onto bacon wrapped
gentrification
when you changed the world
did you make it better or
just cash the paychecks
please excuse me for
being out of touch due to
insecurity
some crumbs i found in
the couch from a previous
past version of you
let’s go back to where
we started and do it all
over but better
disconnecting from
everything left me alone
in new potential
interruptions keep
breaking my concentration
attention pre gone
here is a story
that makes me sound smart without
saying it outright
pineapple pimple
peanuckle pinnacle people
pickle popsicle

November

we narrowly dodged
a terrible accident
and laughed in panic
do you think about
when we were kids and loved each
other so madly
this humble maudlin
blue atmosphere is fueling
morose disquiet
has naiveté
made you foolish or is it
a pathway to joy
your impossible
choice led me astray into
unwanted darkness
life is loaded with
regrets if you second guess
i guess i shouldn't have
oh hi reply guy
why you gotta drive by my
side with your stink eye
reading letters i
wrote twenty years ago that
sound like someone else
crawled into bed late
blurry eyes spy shadows and
foggy memories
trademark copyright
all rights reserved but they stole
your work anyway
painful words barb from
your mouth like shards of glass sent
right into my heart
have you completed
all of your tasks for the day
productive human
fiber optic lines
transfer at the speed of light
all of these cat gifs
this plastic bottle
will outlast us but pretend
to recycle it
rose colored glasses
lied to me! everything was
in fact terrible
turn the oven up
to 450 and throw in
all the pizza rolls

December

keeping your trinkets
coffee cups and collections
around for comfort
i'd like to connect
to your unprofessional
network of shitposts
double up double
down double header double
trouble double dare
what recalictrant
ossified calcified stale
retrograde thinking
copper pipe lukewarm
tap water concrete footprints
vinyl furniture
microwave popcorn
live tweeting rubbernecking
the apocalypse
text messages like
postcards we forgot how to
talk to each other
manufactured text
generated by machines
presented as human
platinum gold rewards
premier executive club
ultra super wash
permanent absence
makes this cold month colder still
i miss your laughter
despite everything
and all the complications
we are still hopeful
syncopated beat
secret rhythm entrancing
uncontrolled brain candy
sorry to disturb
you but ignoring problems
does not help solve them
manufactured cheese
product may contain traces
of wheat, soy, milk, soul
there are too many
cats wandering around here
it's freaking me out
computation and
algorithm automate
emotional state
maybe next year will
finally be the one that
feels relaxed again
60 24
7 30 52
365 time
exhuming old feuds
to reset for a new year
bygones gone to hell